The Danger Of Fatherless Homes

The Bible says in Proverbs 22:15, “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him.” And often when I think about this verse, I think about the importance, the vital place of fathers in homes. Because fathers are the primary disciplinarians. And so, it is important for us to think today about the role of fathers. Or better still, I want us to think about what happens in homes where there are absentee fathers.

What happens in homes where there are absentee fathers?

I was reading the other day a list of what happens in homes where fathers are non-existent. Let me just quickly draw your attention to that list:

1. Children are four times in greater risk of poverty. The reason is because the man is the primary bread winner, while the wife is the primary bread maker. And so, this explains why the absence of a father often leads to less of an economic foundation to enable children to build their own wealth upon in years to come.
2. They are seven times more likely to become pregnant as teens. Again, teenage girls need to have a male figure in their lives who can love them emotionally without taking advantage of them sexually. Without a father, most teenage girls look for this love in all the wrong places.
3. Children are more likely to have behavioural problems. When children enter adolescence, their hormones begin to run riot. That is when mothers fail to handle them and behavioural problems get set in concrete. They need to have that strong masculine figure in their lives to hold them down.
4. Children are more likely to face abuse and neglect. There’s no doubt that there is nothing that can be compared to a mother’s love and care. However, when mothers remarry, it becomes hard for the new men in their lives to really connect with the children and often the result is abuse or neglect.
5. Children are two times at greater risk of infant mortality. Most of the babies who die in the womb do so because they have been aborted. I think let’s face it that’s a fact. However, even after birth, the absence of the help of a loving husband can have deathly consequences. 
6. Children are more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol. This is often the result of the failure by teens to handle their hormonal changes. They want to experiment with adult fun. A father in the home will not allow this. He detects it very early and discipline soon moves in. 
7. Children are more likely to go to prison. Social workers who serve in prisons will easily tell you that most men who are in prison are products of fatherless homes. The failure to discipline in the home landed the children in the hands of policemen and the point is quite clear, they should have not been there if there was a father in the home to help.
8. Children are two more times likely to suffer obesity. Now, this list is definitely not a Zambian one because that’s a situation that is a lot more rare in our situation. But in western countries it’s the order of the day and part of the reason is that there isn’t that one person who is going to ensure that self-control is insisted upon and so, the lack of discipline leads to this kind of problem.
9. Children are more likely to commit crime. And that’s where that Bible verse I read earlier on comes in so handy, when it says, “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him.” The absence of a father’s discipline in the home causes this folly to grow into a wild bush until it is completely difficult to arrest it and a child becomes a criminal. Well, the last and that is number
10. Children are two times more likely to drop out of high school. This is often again because of the lack of finances in the home or a child falling into bad company and consequently failing to come out of it. Too many brilliant children have been lost to education primarily because there was no father figure in the home.

I think the statistics here must be showing in no uncertain terms that we need not just a mother in the home, we also need a father in order to ensure that parenting takes place in a God-honouring way. And trust me, this list was not from Christian statisticians, it’s just individuals who observed and therefore ended up giving us these statistics. It is confirming what the bible teaches that there’s need for a male, as well as a female figure in the context of a home. Let’s make sure we emphasize both.