When I finished my honours that was 2015. End of 2015 I went back home and I can say I wasn’t sure what was going to happen the next year. I really wanted to come back and do ministry but it was a time where I just had to believe God that I’d come back on a visa because we had been trying to get a visa the whole year and we had failed. So I was sent back home and when I got there I just had to wait on the Lord, literally.
the scariest part for me was not knowing where I was going in those eight months; just knowing that God is faithful enough to take me through
Waiting on the Lord
I didn’t have an income but by God’s grace the church supported me through those months. It was eight months of just believing that God was going to work out His good in me. If it was to come back, he was going to make it happen. I think the scariest part for me was not knowing where I was going in those eight months; just knowing that God is faithful enough to take me through. If it was His will that I come back to South Africa to do ministry he was going to make it happen. I struggled so much believing that.
Struggling to believe
I struggled to trust that God had a plan – I started making Plan B’s and plan C’s – and eventually God came through. I knew people were praying for me and once or twice I would probably say a prayer to God and tell Him “may your will be done.” But I was really low and finally God came through again and I think Romans 8:28 says it the best. “All things work out for the good of those who are
called according to his purpose.” And I think that for me was big because I wanted to be here, I didn’t want to be in corporate. I wanted to serve in ministry.
I chose to believe that God had a plan and more than anything it was to grow my inner being – to rely on Him more
Growing on the inside
I felt that God was growing me in my faith. I normally depended on other people to do things. So yeah, the church will do this for me. My friends will do this for me. My parents will do this for me. But this was a time where I didn’t know what was happening. I would go to the visa office and they say “no, there’s no applications being taken” and that would go on for two months. So I chose to believe that God had a plan and more than anything it was to grow my inner being – to rely on Him more than anything. And I think that’s what I went through for those whole eight months. I think I grew so much in the Lord even through the storm. I had to believe that he was with me and he actually was!
Stay above the waves
If you know the Lord keep your eyes above the waves because God is with you. So, continue praying. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding because it’s futile, it’s true. Don’t try to make yourself a Superman or Superwoman. Know that God is with you and trust Him and believe in Him. Get friends to encourage you and to spur you on in the faith. Don’t be alone. And yeah, just keep trusting God and keep your eyes on the cross.