Twenty years ago, I had no clear picture of what my future would look like. I had hopes, yes, but no real direction. Now, as a husband and small business owner, I look at my life and still find myself asking: Where am I really going?
I’ve been asked this several times. But I don’t know.
Recently, a friend asked me a question that pierced deeper than I expected: “Now that you are where you are, what are your plans?” I had no clear answer. The truth is, I’ve been asked this several times over the past few months, and I still hesitate. Because I don’t know.
As I consider the messiness of life and the uncertainty of my own path, I find myself wondering: Is God really in control? Can I trust him with the details I cannot see? Can I hold on to his promises when my plans have failed? These are questions I often wrestle with. Maybe you do too. So let’s walk through this together.
The Pattern of Failed Plans
As I reflect, I have begun to notice a pattern. I am quite good at making plans. But I’m also quite familiar with watching them fall apart, seeing my plans fail. Years ago, I was convinced I would marry a certain sister in the Lord. I was sure she was the one. Today, I’m married to someone else. A better plan. God’s plan.
I’m good at making plans. But I’m quite familiar with watching them fall apart.
In 2018, I was asked to describe where I saw myself in five years. I boldly wrote that I wanted to be the Executive Director of a thriving local organisation. That never happened. Instead, God took me down a different road. A road filled with disappointment, growth, redirection, and dependence.
Even today, if someone asks for my CV, I hesitate. Not because I lack experience, but because my path hasn’t been linear. It is full of turns, starts, and shifts. I don’t fit into a neat five-year projection. I’m slowly learning that may be exactly where God wants me.
When Dreams and Reality Clash
I want to serve God faithfully. I feel a growing desire to serve him in ministry. Yet, I still ask, how will I survive? I run a small business. I work hard. But the marketplace is difficult. My efforts do not always bear fruit. My vision for the future often seems misaligned with my present responsibilities. I believe I’m called to serve. But how do I trust God when the way forward feels uncertain?
God doesn’t ask us to know every detail. He asks us to trust him with every step.
Last month, I was invited to speak at a youth fellowship. But I had to decline because of work-related travel. The conflict between ministry longing and economic survival is real. In moments like that, I wonder if I’ve failed God or if I’m missing out on his plans.
This is where I have begun to learn a hard but necessary truth. God does not ask us to know every detail. He asks us to trust him with every step.
Learning to Trust Through Uncertainty
Proverbs 16:9 reminds us, “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” This isn’t a command to stop planning. It is a reminder that our plans are always under God’s sovereign authority. That authority is never confused. It is always good.
Walking with God often means walking without full clarity.
I think of Abraham. When God called him, he didn’t give him a map. He simply said, “Go from your country…to the land that I will show you” (Genesis 12:1). And Abraham went, not knowing where he was going (Hebrews 11:8). Like Abraham, I am learning that walking with God often means walking without full clarity. The Christian life is not marked by confidence in our plans. It is marked by confidence in Christ.
Admit Weakness and Learn Dependence
Lately, my prayers have been honest. Sometimes short. Often weak. But they are real. Prayer has become the vehicle by which I bring my weary heart to the Lord. I do not always pray with boldness. But I pray. I ask. And I wait. I tell the Lord that I feel like I am losing my way. I ask him to hold my hand.
This is the comfort of adoption. God does not expect his children to know everything. He expects us to call on him. “You have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, ‘Abba! Father!'” (Romans 8:15). That is often my cry. And I believe God hears.
Our Peace Despite the Unknown
I look back at my life, and even though I did not plan this road, I see God’s hand. He has walked with me through grief, loss, delay, unexpected turns and failed plans. Through it all, he hasn’t abandoned me. I am learning that I am safe with Christ, even when I do not have answers. My peace is not built on perfect planning. It is built on a perfect Saviour. The gospel reminds me that I am not alone. I belong to him.
My peace isn’t built on perfect planning; it’s built on a perfect Saviour.
God has redeemed me, not because of what I have done, but through the death and resurrection of Jesus. His righteousness covers me. His Spirit keeps me. God, in his mercy, leads me. Paul’s words to the Philippians hold me up: “He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6).
That promise is enough.
He Will Never Leave You
If you are reading this and feel just as unsure, just as confused, just as tired, take heart. You are not alone. The Lord has not forgotten you. Your uncertainty is not beyond his wisdom. Your future is not beyond his care. You do not need to have everything figured out. You need Christ. He is enough. “Please hold my hand, Lord. When I take things into my own hands, I lose my way. But with You, I am found.”
