Is it Okay to Watch Porn with my Spouse?
Those who answer yes often give this one reason: Its for educative purposes to improve their sexual experience in their marriage. But I think the answer is a firm no. You see the Bible places a high premium on sex. It calls it sacred. But its only good and beautiful when it is done privately by two legally married, consenting adults, of the opposite sex. Whereas pornography basically presents us with a view of adults committing sexual acts for public consumption and commercial purposes. There are a number of reasons why this isn’t right.
the Bible places a high premium on sex. It calls it sacred.
Sex is No Longer Sacred
Now, in a movie where you see somebody being killed, we know that that person isn’t actually being killed. They are acting. But with pornography, people are somewhat sexually… they are engaging in sexual acts but they are acting. Well, the problem here is that they are actually committing sex. So they have to trick themselves that this isn’t sacred. This person, for the purposes of this movie, is meant to mean something to me. But actually they don’t mean anything to them. So, in that sense it is dehumanising.
Someone Else Enters your Marriage
Secondly, you start to fantasise about somebody who isn’t your spouse. You have this weird scenario where, when engaging in sexual intimacy with your spouse, you are also thinking about somebody else. This brings somebody else into the marriage. And that is not good. But at the same time, the person you are fantasising about, who is a human being created in the image of God, is just an object to arouse your sexual desire.
Pornography is Predatory & Addictive
Third, is that porn is actually predatory. And it often preys on people who are economically disenfranchised and are desperate; quiet often women. And then finally – something that we don’t discuss – is that it causes an addiction that is very similar to drug addiction and gambling addiction.
A better way of improving your sexual experience is by increased communication with your spouse.
Listen, the reason for viewing porn might be legitimate, but the means isn’t. A better way of improving your sexual experience is by increased communication with your spouse. But at the same time sacrificial love to please them and not yourself.
